Artie Bevaqua thought she was a typical product of a dysfunctional family until she discovered that “dysfunctional” didn’t begin to describe Angus, the 2,000 year old Scottish schizophrenic who lives in her head. With over 100 personalities for him to choose from, Artie’s internal discussions can resemble the dialogue of a small psychotic nation. And Angus’ two favorite alternate personalities are a 19th century New Orleans hooker who gave Kama Sutra lessons during the Civil War and a 14th century German farmer whose fashion sense is only surpassed by Elvira, Artie’s mother and Empress of the Bevaqua family. But now a large pharmaceutical company wants to separate her from her mental tenant and another group of unknown assassins keeps making totally incompetent kidnap attempts. Thankfully, none of them really want her dead, just caged for the rest of her life for testing purposes. Of course, meeting the handsome, but frustrating Caleb Campbell certainly helped-sort of-but he’s keeping as many secrets as a college sorority so who’s a girl to trust?